I really am trying to get used to this stimulator. There are
times that I get these jolts that beat a good caffeine buzz from some huge
chocolate miracle with a chaser of my Mountain Dew days of past. There are some
benefits of this new little device, but lots of my pain is located above where
this unit can reach. It is just my legs and groin, my back is left for me. I
sometimes try to turn up the amplitude and frequency to a “rock star” level in
the vain attempts that it will distract my few brain cells into thinking I’m
having a marvelous, scratch that, a pretty good day.
I’ve been busy working on signing for church on Ash
Wednesday. I got a copy of the service and am devoting lots of time to learn
and relearn lots of signs. My memory is not at its finest, probably partially
due to the fact that I am zapping my body at increasing levels. When I signed
with Stephanie in the past, I could and did continually ask her, “What’s the
sign for that again?” And she would instantly tell me again and again and
again. I loved the mother-daughter bonding opportunity. Now, I have Janet-Janet
bonding and believe it or not, it’s working. I am so excited about this opportunity.
It’s allowing me the chance to be able to do something and do it well. I don’t
get to do “well” very often anymore.
I need this!
I’m not expecting a wave of pity crashing down on me or a
sudden onslaught of encouragement either. The previous sentences were a
truthful synopsis of how I feel. I’m ever so grateful to have this opportunity
to sign once again. It’s been a long time. My church, or at least the choir
director, is ready to give me this chance. I’m the one who can’t sit through an
entire church service due to the vibrations of many musical presentations. Due
to the solemnity of the Ash Wednesday service, there won’t be any loud organ or
any instrumental accompaniment. So I get my chance. I don’t mean to shine, but
a little glimmer in front of the congregation, my church family would be
lovely. Thanks Scott! You have returned to me a slice of my pride that I
thought was forever lost.
So I’ll keep practicing in order to share my blessings next
Wednesday. Say some prayers that I won’t get jolts and the rest of my body will
God-willing behave. I want to be able to use my abilities so others will feel
the enormity of Ash Wednesday while I also get a renewed hug from God. Life is
good!
God Uses My Chronic Pain to Prove that Life is Good:
- Since I haven’t been allowed to sign
for so long, this Ash Wednesday will be extra special for me. I feel God
talking. Thanks Scott.
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